You ever have one of those days where it is like 3:30 pm and you just want to go and have a drink? That was yesterday for me. I swear it must have been a full moon. I woke up and everything was fine and dandy until Monkey man decided he was not going to do his chores for the day. Now we don’t ask much of him in the way of chores so it is not like it would be something to complain about and really we don’t get on him to do them every day either but the days we have nothing going on and are home all day he has to get them done. Yesterday was one of those days where he needs to do his chores.
So then the screaming and the crying starts. Like really kid, is it that hard to put your shoes away? I get that it is not fun and that there are a million other things that you want to do. There are a million things I would rather do than step on your lego airplane you decided to leave on the ground or clean the toilet because you still haven’t mastered aiming. Don’t worry either has your dad. But In life there are things that we are always going to have to do and we aren’t going to like doing them but they need to get done.
Finally around 10 am he gives up and decides it is time just to get them done. So I go about my day and start switching the laundry, washing the dogs, and cleaning the dishes. I figure monkey man is going to be getting hungry soon so I begin making his lunch and when I go to get him from his room I walk in on the worse mess I have seen since he decided to finger paint with his poop as a 2-year-old.
Monkey man had gone into my office, found his puff paints, and painted with them everywhere. It was all over him, all over the bed, all over the carpet, and all over the walls. I took him to the bathroom to get him cleaned up and discovered it was all over the bathroom counter and floor as well. Like really kid, you will be 5 in less than a month and you think this is good behavior? The worst part of it was that we had literally just talked about how you can’t use the paints without mommy yesterday when I caught him taking them out of my office the first time.
While trying to get him in the shower to get cleaned up I tell him that I am disappointed in him and unfortunately he is not going to be able to go to his playdate because I am now going to have to figure out how to get all this cleaned up without the apartments finding out about it. Because God knows we can not afford the insane amount of money apartments charge for things like this. This lead to yet another meltdown. But this time it was a screaming, crying, hitting, kicking fit. Then it happened, Monkey man said the 4 words that just broke me. “I HATE YOU MOMMY!” No one can prepare you for when those words hit. It knocks the wind out of you and makes your heart break in so many ways. Those 4 words break you. The make you question every parenting choice you have ever made.
That’s when I was done. I felt like just saying “Well buddy, Mommy doesn’t like you very much right now either.” But I can’t say that to this little boy. The only little boy who has my heart. Even if he just threw it on the floor and jumped all over it. So Instead I cleaned up the mess, Cleaned up the kid, and when everything was back in order, I poured myself a drink. Let me tell you, That drink tasted damn good after a day of yelling, screaming, tantrums, and stress. That drink didn’t solve the problem, or make it go away, but it calmed me down and gave me a chance to go back and have the conversation that needed to be said.
I can not believe that yesterday happened, that my sweet little boy said he hated me, But it did and I will get through it, and then it will happen again and I will get through that as well. Because Life will go on and honestly if your kids don’t ever hate you for something, you’re not doing your job to shape them and form them into who they need to be in life. Our job to prepare them for life is not easy, but it is worth it in the end if they come out healthy, happy, and successful.
Do your kids hate you?